Dazed and Confused...

I was having dinner with kelvin wong aka young man at vivoshitty this evening... We didn't talk much, but I was close to pouring out my heart...

I know I have only put in the effort which is far from my best, but I somehow feel I shouldn't be feeling miserable... Does God really look at me this way? Is this really how I'm meant to live my life? Can't I please God in my own unique way? Is God please by only this way??

While I know that all of us are suppose to obey God in this way, but not all of us are gonna get the same results, are we?? And why is it that people always seem to judge one another in that way?? I don't believe that I'm a loser if I ain't as good as the rest in this aspect...

But somehow I am haunted by the thought that if I have failed once, I am gonna fail again...

Well, I guess nobody understands what I just wrote... Which is good... I just had to write what was on my mind...