1SIR - first and foremost!!

If you are in army now, and your surname is Teo, and you happen to be a corporal too, I feel sorry for you, you must the be butt of all jokes right now...

CPL DAVE TEO MING (in Military Service Writing, all names have to in caps, you see...), 20, went AWOL with his made in Singapore SAR21 rifle and some live rounds from his camp in Mandai Hill on a Sunday night 2 weeks ago... An island-wide manhunt (no, not the one for muscles) was conducted by the Singapore Police Force and SAF in search of CPL TEO.

Honestly, this is something rather exhilarating for us NSFs, who lead otherwise boring and dull lives in our camps and bunks (and offices)... Thanks to CPL TEO, there had seem to be extra 'stuff' to talk about over the tables in the cookhouse... Thanks to CPL TEO, we look forward to cookhouse food...

Back to CPL TEO... What in the world was going on in his head?? According to the papers, he broke up with his girlfriend a few months back... How did he possibly make the getaway from the guard comd at the gate?? I pity the poor guard comd, who's most probably an NSF too... I think he will be serving 20 days SOL (nope not school of leaders, it means stoppage of leave, aka confinement) at least, and then, he will also follow into the footsteps of CPL TEO to become the butt of all jokes in his camp... It ain't as if CPL TEO is in Nee Soon Camp, where the Music and Dance Company is... If not, he can just tell the guard comd that he is bringing his erhu home for practice...

And who the heck was this guy that CPL TEO rendezvous with in Hotel 81 in Geylang??? 2 males in a budget hotel room?? in geylang?? perhaps the leftover Big Breakfasts from Macdonalds were just meant as a diversion...

That very next day, CPL TEO was caught in one of the toilets in Orchard Cineleisure with his 'erhu' beside him in the cubicle... guess what was he wearing?? *drumrolllllll* A SUIT WITH TIE!!! phwoar, he must have decided to go on a Yakuza-style shooting spree in Orchard Road, man!! He must have thought, 'only 1 mth to ORD, only 1 month left to take the gun, only 1 month left to gotta prove to the world that i can be cool!

Thanks to CPL TEO, kengsters in NS can now come up with new reasons to escape the system!! 'I just broke up with my girlfriend, and I have an urge to put on a suit when I go to the toilet...' That's it!! The MO will immediately give you PES E and you can be a clerk like me! (and no! I broke up with no one!!)

But no thanks to CPL TEO for the chiongsters... Besides the form to sign when you take weapons, they may have to sign for every single bullet in the future... and then perhaps the SAF will make weapons larger and heavier so they will be harder to bring out of the camp...

And perhaps next time when you see someone who wears a suit and tie for a wrong event, you can say that he has done a 'DAVE TEO!!'